I Don’t Save Anything for the Way Back

Have you ever seen Gattaca(1998)?

It’s one of my favorite films,
and one I go back to when I feel like watching something older.

There’s a scene I can’t forget.

Two brothers, Vincent and Anton,
are swimming in the open sea.

The rule is simple:
whoever turns back first loses.

Anton has the superior genes,
but Vincent wins.

Later, Anton asks him how.

And Vincent says:

“I never saved anything for the swim back.”

I know it sounds a bit extreme,
but I sometimes think of this line
when I try to push a little further than usual.

Especially when I run.

When I want to go farther—not faster—
I just go.

Without thinking about how I’ll get back.

And in the end,
I walk back.

Slowly.
Sometimes endlessly.

So I only do this
when I have enough time.

Some days are really tough,
and some days, I end up taking the bus.

It might sound like something big,
but what I’ve actually increased is small.

From 10km to 11km,
from 11km to 12km.

A small change,
but still not easy for a beginner like me.

So today,
I went a little further again.

To a place I had never been before.

And I reached a spot
where the cherry blossoms were beautiful.

Now my brain will probably remember
that distance as something I’ve already done.

So maybe next time,
it’ll feel a little less unfamiliar.

There’s no real conclusion to this.

Just a record of going a little further.
Or maybe, a film recommendation.

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